Carpe effin diem!

My mom taken using a Holga 150, color slide with light leaks!

There are really some days when life reminds you to slow down and reflect on what's really important in this world.

 Eversince I lost my mother everything has changed. I don't know if it's just me or if my siblings feel this way too but after I have realized the importance of being alive, all I want to do is just be happy. I have shut down or refuse to listen to people who tries to hinder me from my own happiness and that is in choosing who I care and love. Sometimes I don't talk about things anymore and keep my worries and fears to myself instead just to uphold my goal of being happy.

I still feel empty and I really do miss my mom. I miss her love. I miss her telling me what to do with my life! I miss her smile, our conversations, her laughter!

Because of this drastic event, I felt like I shouldn't miss out the great moments in my life. I focused on spending time with my family and being the happy seven we once was. No material thing can exchange the happiness and pleasure of being with them. Laughing, eating together, going on journeys are a few of my favorite reasons of feeling immense joy. And ofcourse there is my self. Consider it selfish but focusing on 'me' made me do the things that have always been on just a list. These things are what I enjoy doing now, hobbies, work goals and improving relationships with people who are really there for you.

I like being embraced with joyful things, events and happy positive souls and that's what I intend  to do until another drastic change is going to come up sooner or later.

Life is short, enjoy it while it lasts.